And the Oscar Goes To…

By this point most people are aware of the colossal mistake that happened this past Sunday night at the Oscars. In what people are calling the biggest error ever in the history of the awards, Faye Dunaway and Warren Beatty announced La La Land as the incorrect winner in the most anticipated moment of the evening. It is no surprise he made this mistake, considering he was handed the wrong envelope. Ultimately, Moonlight was crowned as the true winner amidst much confusion and deflation from the producers and cast who thought they had won. Jimmy Kimmel noted that this Oscars would be remembered not for the various awards won, but for the huge mistake that was heard around the world.

But how huge was it?

Other than the devastation felt by the producers of La La Land, there have been more impactful mistakes made in history. There are the twelve publishing houses that rejected a manuscript from an unknown author. One publishing house finally picked it up. That manuscript was the first of the Harry Potter series, by author JK Rowling-hardly unknown at this point. Or the moment in 1914 when a British soldier by the name of Henry Tandey, who became the most decorated private during World War I, may have stood over an unarmed solider named Adolf Hitler in a ditch and decided not to shoot him in cold blood. In 2009, Facebook turned down programmers Brian Acton  and Jan Koum  at job interviews. The pair went on to develop WhatsApp, ultimately bought by Facebook for $19 billion just a few years later. In sports, there was the 1991 field goal in the Super Bowl, the ill advised time out in 1993 and most famously, the 1919 trade of a young man named Babe Ruth, who proceeded to hit 665 home runs and lead the Yankees to four World Series titles over the next 15 seasons.

One of the most difficult parts of making a mistake is recognizing and admitting it. Chief Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks tells of a visit of then American ambassador to the Court of St James, Philip Lader. Lader and his wife initiated a project in 1981, known as Renaissance Weekends. People in positions of leadership and power would come together every so often for a retreat to share ideas, listen to experts and think collectively through challenges they anticipated in the coming years. Almost all of the participants, particularly gifted people, found one thing particularly difficult: admitting that they made mistakes. So they set aside a session at each weekend that they called “My biggest blooper”, sharing something they did that they were ashamed to admit.

In Judaism, this is what Yom Kippur is, a day to admit our shortcomings and atone for our sins. We can learn a lot from Yehuda, who confesses “tzadka mimeni” after realizing his sin with Tamar. David HaMelech famously responds “chatati,” I have sinned, when confronted by Natan HaNavi about his guilt with Uriah and Batsheva. Our religion helps us admit our mistakes, by helping us understand that G-d forgives, that we can condemn an act without losing faith in the person, and that creates a culture in which we are not ashamed to admit wrongdoing, especially in the area of our dealings with other people.

Big or small, mistakes are a part of life. Some have dire consequences, and some are resolved. Despite the difficult feelings, we can all reflect on how mistakes have bettered us. As teachers and parents, it is essential to recognize that mistakes help teenagers in a number of ways. They can learn about responsibility, coping skills, how to adapt and not to fear failure. When they “mess up,” adolescents learn to deal with disappointment and not to feel entitled. They learn to solve problems by dealing with them rather than blaming others, and they learn to tolerate the push and shove of every day life.

While nobody wants to watch kids fail, let us reflect on the fact that protecting them from failure restricts their thinking and prevents them from trying new things. And while I wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of the blame so fiercely placed on PricewaterhouseCoopers, I admire their willingness to admit their error and am reassured by the fact that this Oscars blunder probably won’t happen again.